Woman shares clever hack she uses when men ask to split the bill on first date
The age-old question of 'Who pays for the first date?' has baffled the world before dating apps and social media changed the game. Time and again the question sparked discussions about gender roles and equality. The internet is divided once again by a woman who shared a viral hack to put men, who ask to split the bill on the first date, down. The TikTok creator Pearl Botts (@pearlbotts) shared a video explaining the so-called hack.
Who should pay on the first date?
In the video, which now has over 11.8 million views, the creator tells women what to do when their date asks to split the bill on a first date. Sitting in her car, the creator says, "When a man wants to go fifty-fifty with you on a first date, do this."
She then proceeds to enact the whole situation getting into the character of a woman who had just been asked to split the bill. She goes on to cover her mouth, acting all surprised and gasping. She then says, "Oh my god, I am so embarrassed right now. You wanted to be just friends?"
She then goes on to say that she thought it was a date the entire time and had no idea and she thought that they were on a date. "Here's my card," the creator says at the end. Thus, she suggests that any man who asks to split the bill on the first date wants to be just friends or should be just "friendzoned" as they call it.
The opinion was controversial enough to draw a range of comments. "I have never been on a 50/50 date. Choose right you guys," wrote user @t20280 supporting the creator's opinion. "Okay but every time a man went 50/50 on a first date I DID assume that meant he just wanted to be friends 💀 bc isn’t that like embarrassing for them??" added another user @jeniofalltrades.
Meanwhile, other supporters of the motion went on to share their own ideas on what to say if women are asked to split. "'Omg yes I’m sorry I didn’t realize you need help with it let’s split it for sure!'" wrote user @katiemac758. "This happened and I said “I don’t split, I’ll pay” made him feel real embarrassed," suggested another user, @brittanyjoyjoy.
On the other hand, opposers of the creator's thinking argued their reasons too. "How many times do you or women you know go out with a man just for free stuff? That’s why first dates go 50/50. It’s just to get to know one another," commented user @tc_targets.
"why do they have to pay for everything in order to feel a romantic connection tho... I don't like people paying for me, date or friend," argued another user @starcarverr.
@pearlbotts would u do this? #datingadvice #datingtips #datingmindset ♬ IT GIRL (Sped up Version) - Aliyah's Interlude
Here's who experts think should pay the bill
A 2024 survey conducted on behalf of self-financial found that about 44% of US adults think whoever earns the most should pick up the tab. Out of the three choices, "Whoever earns more, Whoever organized the date and Equal split", the last option was the second most popular with 36% of the respondents getting behind it. Thus, only the remaining fifth of respondents thought whoever organized the date should pay.
However, in a CNBC Make It report, etiquette expert Diane Gottsman suggests that letting the person who organized the date pay, may be the most reasonable approach and the other party should get the bill next time.
Furthermore, money expert Sallie Krawcheck warned in the report that the outcome of who pays the bill can set the tone of a possible relationship. She suggests that the person who covers the first check could tilt the power dynamic in a relationship, "intentionally or not".