Finance expert Dave Ramsey has major advice for couples looking to merge finances

Managing finances as an individual may be tricky in this economy, but married people also need higher financial literacy and better planning to navigate the current landscape. "If you’re married and keep separate finances, you’re not a team—you’re just roommates with wedding rings," says personal finance expert and best-selling author Dave Ramsey. He said this when a woman asked for advice on merging bank accounts with her husband of ten years. While most would have called her out for holding back for so long, Ramsey explained the situation in simple terms, offering some great advice. 

In an episode of Ramsey's podcast, the caller explained that she and her husband had been together for 13 years and were married for a decade, yet they keep their finances totally separate. She told Ramsey that they felt she was the more financially responsible one and admitted that she didn't want to share access to her finances with her husband. However, she now wanted to re-engage with her husband in the discussion as she had lost her job during COVID and was worried about the family's financial well-being.

After asking her about his husband's job and why she thought she was the responsible one, Ramsey focused on the foundation of their marriage and what the couple hoped to build together. "You're not his mom," he said, commenting on the thought that sharing finances may diminish control for any of them over their finances. He advised her to treat this like a contract and explain to her husband that they are both adults in this and they need to work toward a common financial goal without breaking it.

"Money touches everything, so if a couple is fighting about money, that tension can also affect areas like trust, parenting, or intimacy," Ramsey has mentioned in his blog on the subject. In the episode, he pointed out that according to a survey of ten thousand millionaires, it was found that the vast majority of them worked with their partners toward a common goal. "So, statistically, if you want to be a millionaire, you're doing it wrong!" he told the caller.

In the end, he advised the caller to sit down and define their financial objectives together, and once they set those goals, they need to abide by the contract and evaluate every purchase that either partner wants to make against a shared framework that asks if it moves them closer to their goals. Once this is clear, everything should be merged, Ramsey advised.

"One checkbook, one budget, one set of goals, and one set of fears that are shared. When you do that, there's no stopping. Ding! Ding! Ding! Your probability of a high-quality marriage, your probability of wealth building, it goes way up!" he said. He added that the unity of purpose will strengthen the household's financial position no matter what challenges arise. "Otherwise, way down you have a roommate," instead of a partner, Ramsey commented.

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