Man decides to spend kids' inheritance money after they refused to take care of him, asks if he's wrong
Leaving all your wealth to your kids seems like an obvious decision. However, parents are now looking at different things to do with their money, especially at a time when more and more children are abandoning their parents in their old age. A Reddit user recently took to subreddit AITA to talk about why he decided against leaving all his money to his kids.
He began by saying he had had a good relationship with his children, but they were a bit distant since his wife's death. He received a "hefty" inheritance from his parents.
"This inheritance is not only a product of my parents work but money that has been in my family for decades, so it is expected of me to try and save as much of the inheritance for my children and so on," he said.
He said how in their culture, parents are supposed to take care of their parents in their old age. "Both my mom and dad suffered from diseases that required 24/7 care by the end of their life. These diseases run in the family so most likely I will suffer from one of them too," the OP said.
"A few months ago I made an offhand comment about going to the doctor for my annual visit, since my health has been not so great. I said, 'Has anyone talked about who I will live with when I'm old and wrinkly?' It was a light comment, I'm actually not planning to live with any of my children yet," he said.
He said this little talk did not sit well with his children who told him how they will not be taking care of him in his old age, citing reasons like the growing cost of living and more.
"Since then, I've made the decision to start to plan for my old age. I moved a lot of the funds of the inheritance to my savings account, and plan to go on trips that I've always wanted to go to while I'm still a bit young and healthy. I plan to pay for this with the inheritance."
He planned to go to Mexico and told his daughter who asked him how he was going to pay for the trip. I told her, "I'm planning to use the inheritance from now on to pay for trips." His daughter called him selfish and accused him of punishing them for not following tradition.
He said his kids are now "mad" at him for robbing them of the money that their grandparents promised them. "They are all very mad at me and refuse to talk to me to get to an agreement," he says.
Most people in the comment section noted that the OP is not at fault. "It is YOUR inheritance. They will get whatever you leave for them. Inheritance only exists upon passing. Live and fund your old years as you wish. Your children can fend for themselves," one comment read, while another talks about why the OP is not at fault.
"NTA. Your children were callous to tell you point-blank they would not be taking care of you if you needed help in old age. They openly said they were going to take the selfish route and leave you out in the cold at the most vulnerable time of your life. When they said that, they broke the social contract that existed in your family for previous generations. Since they broke the reciprocal social contract, they can't expect you to hold up your end of the deal."
While the ways to disinherit your children can vary from state to state, in most states, a parent can disinherit their child. In case you are planning to do so, please reach out to an estate planning attorney who can help you with the dos and don'ts.
