Money Matters: 10 Family Lessons That Hit Close to Home

Family Messes That Will Have You Guarding Your Finances  

The subreddit "Am I The A-Hole" is where people come to share about the dramas in their lives and ask the members if they are the ones at fault for doing what they did. Most of the time, the issues are family-related, and at times also involve money. All of these stories tell us in one way or another to keep our money close. Here are 10 such stories shared by people. 

1. Big Wedding, But At What Cost?

One AITA post from 2023 talks about how important it is to keep changing your passwords and not trust them with anyone. Everything began when a yet-to-be stepmother wanted a big wedding and asked her to-be step-kids to contribute financially to the wedding. OP's kind-hearted sister instantly agreed to chip in while his 19-year-old brother was very annoyed with everything that was going on. "When I refused to give her a single buck and suggested that she should just make the celebration smaller, she flipped out, and we had a heated argument." She later simply withdrew money from their accounts as their father had access. "Since I had a good relationship with my father, he had access to one account, [and] she simply took [money],” he said. “It wasn’t a significant amount, but when she refused to return the money, I threatened to report her to the police for theft."

2. The Messy Makeup

In an AITA post, the OP's wife's makeup collection was ruined by the OP's brother's kids. The 12- and 14-year-old kids had broken into their aunt's collection and caused major destruction."They had dug into her eyeshadow palettes with her brushes and poured out her foundations into them and a bunch of her compacts were in the sink soaked in water," OP wrote. He and his wife tallied the damage to her $4K collection. The bill was around $1.5k. The brother later put up a fight. "If the kids came into your home and destroyed a $1500 painting they would be expected to pay for it, right?” one Redditor said. “Makeup is expensive, and, unfortunately, they are in this position, but it is what it is. You break it you buy it. You’re not running a charity or a funhouse for their kids. This is a big learning experience for your bro and his kids; don’t touch other people’s things without express permission," he added.

3. Stealing MIL

One woman took to the subreddit to talk about her mother-in-law who was not asking for support but was downright fooling her husband into paying her. The OP said that the amount that she was asking for property frequently did not make any sense as her husband was making a decent amount of money. After she asked for $15k once, OP reached out to her father-in-law to ask if he knew about it and if they were okay financially. He was shocked to learn that his wife had been taking so much money. 

4. Similar and Equally Sad

A post in the subreddit AITA talks about how their 7-year-old niece and 6-year-old nephew ruined a room full of thousands of dollars worth of art supplies. "I immediately rushed over to the art room and found it was a total mess," he wrote. "I yelled at them to get out and they started crying. My BIL ran over and started yelling at me saying they’re just kids and it’s just markers. I told him that the markers alone were $17 a piece and he said I was stupid for paying that much." "Sally tried to diffuse the situation but my BIL started yelling at her too saying we can’t have this many art supplies and not expect kids to want to use it," he said. "I told him he’s paying to replace the markers and other supplies they ruined and he told me to go f*ck myself and left. Everyone left shortly after that." 

5. Venmo Request Gone Wrong

One of those posts where the OP was tagged wrong by everyone who took to the post to comment their opinion. The OP suffers from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and said that she pays for a cleaning service to keep her home clean. One day after a cleaning session, her stepdaughter brought friends over and said that they "ruined" the house. "I guess they decided not to take their shoes off and walked all around the house leaving footprints. They also made pizza from scratch and left the counters dirty among other things." "Footprints in your house and pizza crumbs do not make a house “filthy.” You had plenty of options other than charging your stepdaughter - you could’ve cleaned it, your husband could’ve, you could have asked her to clean it, etc," wrote one person in the comment.

6. Birthday Party

One mom is tired of sharing her daughter and niece's birthday together because they were born 10 days apart. Her sister-in-law, however, always pushed for a shared birthday party. However, the OP's brother and her sister-in-law never help with the costs so the OP decided to draw a line. SIL asked if this was "the girls’ cake" and OP said no, it was for her daughter since it was her [Formula 1-themed!!!] birthday party. "Now my daughter isn’t going to have any kind of celebration for her birthday this year because you and your husband are so selfish," SIL said before "making a huge scene." People in the comment section unanimously agreed that the OP was not wrong.

7. Saying No to a Nanny

The OP talks about her thoughtful nanny Tessa, who is paid by the state because the OP's daughter has autism. Ruby (OP) is a big reader, and Tessa will buy her books when she is out thrift shopping. Ruby then pays back the money with her allowance. However, one day she ended up spending $50 on the books which was a bit much. "Sometimes it’s better to salvage an important relationship than to be right", wrote one of the people in the comments, while another wrote, "Pay for the books. Let Tessa know that you can’t do so in the future, though, without talking about it. Tell her how much you appreciate her thoughtfulness, now and always."

8. Wedding Drama

This wedding drama has the internet divided. One father of a bride said that he would give the couple an undisclosed amount of money for the wedding. After they decided to elope, the bride asked for that money to fund a month-long honeymoon instead. Of course, the father refused to give them the money. People in the comment section were divided as many supported the bride and others the father. "Your expectations and conditions are entirely reasonable," one user said, while another said. "It was unreasonable for her to assume that she could simply take the ‘cash option’ her," wrote another. 

9. Evil Father

One teen took to Reddit to share how she lost her mother and now her father and her step-mom are trying to pressure her into handing over the house and money that she got from he mother. She says that she plans to stay in the house and use the finances to finish college. "Since then I haven’t heard the end of it, I’m selfish for making us all stay in a tiny flat, I’m spoiled because I won’t share my inheritance, I’m a terrible person for making the twins take out loans. You get the gist," she writes. Redditors sided with the young girl, "You have money. Many people will tell you how to spend it. Ignore them. Save your money for your needs and life goals. Your mom left it to you. Kindness and gifts are fine, modest charitable giving is laudable. But you are young with a long life ahead of you."

10. Tricky Situation

This mom is suffering for asking her daughter to pay rent. Her adult daughter was in a dire situation when she needed to live with her "6 months tops." "She’s an adult now, and she needs to learn to take care of herself, not relying on handouts from her parents." “I hope OP enjoys the retirement home when they hit that age and might need their daughter to help out. Unless you are willing to pay the market rate to her I don’t think she’ll help out, you know, you need to learn to be an adult then too. Don’t come looking for handouts.”